Self-Inventory Guide: Find Your Love
What can you connect from your Parents love and care of you – to how your expectations are for Love and attention today?
How much attention were you given? Can you gauge it, scale from 1-10 (1 being neglect - 10 being absolute love)
Was there an emphasis or concern of safety? Scale
Trying to protect or even control into young adult / adult years?
If you are a Parent where do you see yourself displaying similar parenting?
Where do you display differing parenting?
Your love life
What level of attentiveness do you prefer in partner – think dating level:
- Attention as much as possible/together every chance we have/texting and chatting throughout day?
- Or is it preferable to have your space and time away from one another?
- INCOMING Where do you find your Love? – What in your life brings you a sense and feeling of being loved or loving yourself most?
- Romantic relationships
- Family, children
- Friends, socializing, entertainment
- Successes, careers, goals achieved
- Physical activities, sport, your health
- LACKING What makes you feel a Lack of Love? Where you felt these ways and why, use suggestions of emotional areas to look:
- Romantic - heartbreak, ups and downs, trust betrayed
- Family – struggles and upheavals, fights, children misbehaving in/outside of home, sibling quarrels, parents split up
- Sad - depressions, not fitting in, isolating, anxieties
- Anger – if you’re not angry ever, memories of you being angry & the experience around that
- Stability – financial changes, career changes, home changes, social life ups & downs
Love vs. Lack in Romance
- Romantic Life
- Relationship you can see between incoming & lack
- Strong desires to have romantic partner and love in your life
- Sexual / Physical – the need, importance, and role in romantic life
- Time spent ALONE – no dating, no entertaining, no relationship
- How long was it for
- What was it like for you, what was felt and/or learned
- Long time since living without dating– what’s the meaning of that to you, is there a fear in thinking about being alone
Stabilities in Life Compare Group 1) Family, Friends, Social
Group 2) Career, Financial, Successes
- What makes my life the most stable?
- Where do I feel lack most?
- Where does my stability come from?
- Emotions - Are your emotional ups and downs most related to:
- Social, Friends
- Career, Finances
- Emotions more reactions to other people, circumstances, and things outside of yourself?
- Is there activities / hobbies you participate in that that bring Love to you without the need of others or material? Music, arts, hiking, etc.
- Emotionally base yourself as what keeps you most calm and what raises your emotional level to uncomfortable levels.