Yet, the answers never came to me that would satisfy this questioned suitability I held in my heart for she would soon cease to exist in meeting me half way. Or any amount of way; for she would use her independence and solitude as a prized anchor in which I was intruding upon and infiltrating with my needs and wants of love in a relationship that I was presenting her with. She didn't want it. Nor did she pretend to want it either, god bless her - I stayed in a studio apartment with an individual whom I deathly loved and felt was divinely connected to in holy matrimony by way of the experiences shared between us at the beginning of a spiritual awakening and what would best be categorized as twin flame experience.
For she and I were on this island floating in the Universe, amongst the vastness of conscious living beings who were greatly numbered in earth alone and in the midst of this huge grand display of variety and population we were solely alone staring into one another eyes at the fork in a road which both of our lives had come to through different ways, from differing directions with greatly polarizing views and perspectives we held - from her being a twin raised in Brazil amongst a family of spiritualists and myself, an only child brought up in America's middle class suburbia.
Yet there we met. In the middle of an infinite amount of roads and strings of possibilities - all finally leading us to the moment where we would sit across from one another at the bar that quiet night in September. Our first time meeting having connected through a dating app that I was unenthusiastically navigating at the time.
I swear to you, as she walked in and the image that I had preconceived in my mind of who this girl might be; all came crashing down in the midst of our warm embrace filled with comfort and interest. I couldn't have imagined her true beauty would trump the professional photos she had adorning her profile; but she carried with her an untouchable magnificence in natural beauty.
I remember prior to the meeting we had set, I was asking myself why would I even be trying to participate in this at the current time in my life, for I could barely hold a normal conversation with people dampened by the amazing experiences I was having which not a single person could relate to. Nor were the friends at the time giving any interest in the entertaining details of paranormal visitations I was having; rather the dissecting of my words and body language as they looked for signs of insanity in me, other than the stories I was relaying. As any good friend would.
None-the-less, she came into my life bringing with her that relatability factor which I so drastically missed in my new reality. Not that she could relate to the experiences totally, or at all most the time, she was open-minded enough to be interested more than concerned. In fact, no concern was felt from her end as she fully believed in the experiences as real and had a past with some various paranormal experiences herself (paranormal for lack of a better word).
A beautiful and interesting young lady, my age who shared similar visions of the world, my new reality, and the future desired to live. Honestly, she was like the answer to a prayer from a time before I can even remember...as she definitely entered my life at a time which answered many prayers for me and let me know God was definitely looking out for me and not leaving me to fight alone. But it felt as though she was the response to a prayer set in place a time way before all of this happened...before this lifetime perhaps.
That would insinuate that there is a romantic director behind the divine order of life in the universe. Insinuating there is any divine order at all. With a romantic focused architect preparing the timelines unfolding over all humanity, and all unknown living beings out in the universe we have yet to discover. Which for most is quite the preposterous claim to be made...especially given the reality of the world taken in by most westerners present day.
But what if this entire existence was a love story. What if the world you are viewing is only the stage-play which has been set to make the day of discovery that much sweeter. As it is under the veil, for you and all who had come before you. And all who are here now. Each and everyone of us, have an equal and perfected counter part. Partner. Team mate. Lover. Travel-mate. Husband/wife. And the entire display of the world up until that point, with the orphaned children, the divorces and domestic disputes everywhere, the cheating husband, or the sneaking around wife -- leaving you to never really know if you are due for that painful surprise in the love life you are currently walking in or towards. Will she leave me for someone with more money? Does he think about having sex with other women when he's out of town on business? Aghhh the endless fears of a non-romantic order of life....but what if.
Just maybe. Just maybe, you who reads this now is only yet to cross the gate of that one perfected mate which you were designed to carry life into this world with. The sole purpose of the life you've lived thus far, and you were by no mistake made and created exactly how you are today - and the walls that need to be torn down are already methodically calculated in deconstruction, for the readying of your heart to embrace the true love of your life.
Seeding a Reality: Talks of Life and Meaning
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